Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
So tell me, does it hurt to be so full of sh!t?
You never know whats going on in your life until you’re f*cked up.
Im at a beer tasting today..so far they all taste the same out of this case...well done Budweiser...well done!!
At what point in potty training do you give the child a toy smartphone?
You know it`s a good night when you wake up with gum in your bellybutton.
ah... Crocs the 21st century version of the chastity belt
Today`s society is a good example of what happens when you let the clowns run the circus.
People say that 60 is the new 40. The cop who pulled me over didn`t agree.
Congratulations! You`ve won a lifetime supply of air: Not valid under water, in space, when dead, or while choking.
Cop cars should play the jaws theme song
Secretly replaced the bacon with beggin` strips. Let`s see if the customers notice.
Someone asked me today what was the toughest thing about being a parent ... I would have to say it’s the kids.
Imagine how out of control drinking would if we didn`t have hangovers
I hate it when I tell someone I`ll be there in 10 minutes, but they continue to call me every half-hour anyway
Mail from Grandma: FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:No subject