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The problem with trouble is that it always starts out as fun.
Old meaning of sorry. "I won`t do it again." New meaning of sorry. "Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful."
Please: No,No.No-More about how you think relationships should be: we`ve got it , Your Single,,- get off facebook and go take your own expert advise...
You are on the list of the many things I would do for a Klondike bar.
Shout out to old people for graduating high school without Google.
I look so young for my rage.
B!tch life isn`t a garden ... So stop being a hoe!
"They are more afraid of you than you are of them." -people who know even less about me than they do about bears
Why is there an eject button on the DVD remote? You still have to get up & take the disc out. It`s like having a remote to open the fridge.
What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.
I can catch a speeding bullet- only once.
Today I saw a cat with three legs, which was much better than finding the alternative, just a cat`s leg.
What is it about being blind that makes people want to walk their dog all the time?
Billion dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell "I`m just cooking!"
Baby Polar Bear: Mommy, am I really a Polar Bear? Mother: Of course you are. Why? Baby Polar Bear: `Cause I`m fukcing freezing!"