Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Oh no! I have to enter my date of birth to view this explicit content! Damn this internet security!
I thought the voices in my head actually liked me until I found out they learned sign language just so they could talk sh*t about me.
Never trust a person with only one Facebook photo of themselves.
All I`m saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us. But, whatever, be that way.
Someone asked me today if ive ever been with two women at the same time. But why would I want to disappoint two women at the same time?
I wonder how much a zebra would cost if you scan it…
“FREEZE! NOBODY MOVE!” – Mother Nature
If animals spoke our language we`d be in their debt because they`d have some seriously incriminating dirt on all of us.
How much is appropriate to tip the police officer who opens the squad car door for you?
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
If you could see what goes on inside my head, you would have nightmares for weeks!
We would like to thank everyone that submits statuses to the site. Many get rejected because we don`t think they are funny, or they are unreadable, or they are to inappropriate and offensive.
I`m thinking one of us should probably break the news to the phone book makers that there`s this thing called Google now
My school always awarded dictionaries to the spelling bee winners. Which was weird because it should actually be awarded to the losers.
I wonder if Superman ever put glasses on Lois Lane`s dog & she was like, "I`ve never seen this dog before. Is this a new dog?"