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You say `pervert with a telescope` ... I say `biological astronomer`.
I like to sit outside on campus at night in my 1940s clothes and when people say things to me, I say "You can see me?"
Never take advice from someone more miserable than you are.
Just once Iβd like to learn something the easy way.
Just joined the support group Hokey Pokey Anonymous ... A place to turn yourself around. ;)
Do u ever have the urge to tell someone to shut up even when they arent talking?
The only thing worse than a male chauvinistic pig is a woman that wonβt do as she is told
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Donβt be mad, Iβll be there too. Not in the cage but laughing at you.
Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit.
The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence.
My wife has spent all day arguing that she isn`t stubborn...
βI wish there was a more convenient way to stalk othersβ- The phrase that started Facebook.
eHarmony should be more like Amazon βcustomers who slept with Tina172 also slept with LuvinLife_83, TaintMisbehavin, and Cat_Lover03?.
2013 is the first year since 1987 to have 4 different numbers⦠carry on.
Want someone to stop texting you? Sleep with them.