Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I bet the guy made of money in the Gieco commercial doesn`t ever ride his motorcycle on Martin Luther King Blvd in any town.
I miss the days when minding your own business was a thing.
Parents, forget about teaching your kids about the birds and the bees. Teach your kids the difference between their, they`re and there.
Babe, you look Hot! Is your air conditioner broken?
When I bust a move , it stays busted.
Everyone can stop painting. We all have cameras that can take perfect pictures of everything.
You are by far my smartest and best looking friend on Facebook.
If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that sh!t means but at least they`re not talking to you anymore.
Made some terrible life choices the last few years. Just kidding. I`m married and not allowed to make decisions.
No one understands you better than some crazy weirdos on the internet.
By the time I’ve said “Nice to meet you” I’ve already forgotten your name.
I`ll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions.
Who ever invented the knock knock joke should get the no bell prize.
gone fishing ¸.·´¯`·.¸><((((º>
Dear small line of dirt that wont go in the dustpan… Screw you.