Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Dear automatic flushing toilet. I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I wasn`t quite finished...
Ever have the experience of staring at an outfit hanging in your closet and wondering which of the personalities did the shopping that day?
Next time you are sad remember you can make a cheeseburger with donuts as the bun. Still sad? Add Sprinkles
My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldn`t walk to the donut shop.
I hate it when Hippos fall on me when walking home from school... :D
It`s only October 3rd and I`ve already beaten the sh!t out of two motion activated skeletons at store entrances.
( )( ) =( `-` )= <( . )> ("`)("`) bunny!!
Really don`t see the need for pants for the rest of this day. :)
Let`s be honest. The only reason you listen to your voice-mail messages is to make the stupid icon disappear
Are there actually people who get out of the shower to pee? I want to meet them.
Whenever I see a celebrity photobomb, I`m like, that`s so relatable. I too constantly ruin moments and think I`m more fun than I actually am
Time to try some of this candy from the Easter "bunny"... Can`t trust anything you find laying in the yard these days.
My doctor recommended I increase the amount of Greens in my diet...so I started drinking more Rolling Rock.
I think the lady at the movies is "shushing" me, but I can`t tell because I`m eating Doritos.
I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.