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If I had a dollar for every time I got suspicious… I’d wonder who the f&*k was paying me, and why?
Life is too short to be angry and hold grudges. Just slap them in the face and move on!
The pollen is so bad this year that the people in the trailer parks are turning their crystal meth back into Sudafed.
Change is hard. Seriously have you ever tried to bite a nickel?
Sorry for accidentally karate kicking you. Sorry for high-fiving everyone who saw it.
Well, if you count Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit" then yes, I do like opera.
Call me crazy, but I don`t think I really need to be in this mental institution.
You`d think my neighbors could have the decency to ignore me back.
I have off-road rage, too
Get at least eight hours of beauty sleep, 9 if you`re ugly.
Look Bruce, just because you call it the "Batcave" doesn`t change the fact that you still live in your parents basement.
Did you know , that if you use asterisk , you can do anything you want ? * gets on a t-rex and gallops away into the sunset *
"It`s not about who`s right or wrong."~ The person that is wrong
Now that cell phones are becoming more and more waterproof, pretty soon it will be okay to push people into pools again...
Today`s subliminal thought is: …