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When someone is in a bad mood, I like to help matters by pointing out several times that they seem to be in a bad mood.
If doing things was as easy as thinking about doing things Iād get a lot more done.
The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you dont have to mow it.
When God closes a door, it usually has my fingers in it.
How do amish girls know if its a romantic candle lit dinner or just a regular candle lit dinner.
Welcome to Psychic Abilities 101. Today`s class was just rescheduled for tomorrow. If you`re here now, you failed.
Am I the only one who thinks water has that taste that no one can describe?
"I`m not drunk" - Biggest Friday Night Lie.
Putting your finger on someone`s lips and saying "Shhhh... Not another word." is super-romantic. But the cop didn`t think so.
Helped my kid pick out a "famous past explorer" for a class assignment. Hope no one else in her class picks Internet Explorer 6.
Millions of innocent coconuts are murdered each year so you can drink their nutritious blood you insensitive health freak
I wish they all could be Jerry Springer girls.
"Please take a seat" was a bad introduction for a Kleptomaniacs` Anonymous meeting.
I felt really mischievous earlier so I bought a McDonalds and ate it at a KFC
My motto for the night ... drink till I no longer think :)