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Ziploc`s idea of how big a sandwich should be is very different than mine.
Boobs are a lot like train sets, they were meant for kids, but dad always ends up wanting to play with them.
I am not bossy, I just know how to do things the right way.
Sorry but if these walls could talk I`m pretty sure they`d talk about wall things and not whatever scandal you`re blowing out of proportion.
Getting over body issues is a like getting over a fear of heights. The trick is not to look down.
I am addicted to Cold Turkey. Not sure how I will ever quit that one.
DATING TIP: never reveal how many cats you have.
Quick Hide! Monday is Coming!!
You could completely eliminate the semicolon key and 90% of people wouldn`t notice... until they needed to wink at somebody.
Carfax but for people
I will stop loving you, when Spongebob gets his driving license.
Facebook is like my fridge… I know there is nothing there but I check it every 10 minutes anyways.
I`m getting tired of having to write "Sent from my iPhone" at the end of all my e-mails. Maybe I should just get an iPhone.
gone fishing ¸.·´¯`·.¸><((((º>
I`m in no shape to exercise patience!