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Welcome to my Facebook wall. Straight jackets are on your left, meds are on the table, and if you hurry, you can still get a seat in group therapy . . . have fun!
If you’re not fully satisfied with your life, do something about it. Or complain about it on the internet. Whatever you prefer.
The Great Wall of China has brought more foreigners than it has kept out.
I could kill you with kindness, but shoving you into traffic just saves so much time.
I put a dollar in one of those change machines once. Nothing changed.
People who get offended on the internet are the same people that take mini golf seriously.
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
Today is National I Don`t Feel Like Doing Sh!t Day. Celebrate accordingly.
My girlfriend called me lazy the other day. I almost responded.
Have you ever just sat there and realized how weird you are?
sorry abaut the message I sent you last night, my phone was drunk!
Have you ever ate something so good that you do a little happy dance while your eating it?
If God didn`t want us to eat Animals he wouldn`t made them out of meat.
When I grow up I wanna be a psychiatrist for the mentally insane...so i can find out what the hell is wrong with you people
You find it offensive?... I find it funny.... That`s why I`m happier than you