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K-Y should be called K-WHEN, because we already know why.
I`m home by myself this evening. My wife is out at Kohl`s buying another load of laundry.
I will not let people drive me crazy because I know it`s in walking distance.
You look like I need another drink
There is no evidence that exists that life should be taken seriously.
about love
Pinatas are a great way to teach children that if you repeatedly beat something with a stick, eventually you`ll get what you want.
You know you had a good night when you have to Google map yourself in the morning to find out where the hell you are.
no one is perfect thats why pencil have eraser
When I asked if you had protection, pepper spray isn’t what I meant.
received a call saying that my son had been lying in school, and was being expelled. I don´t have a son. That kid is one damn good liar.
I Like this quote. I dislike this quote. I am so clever that sometimes I don´t understand a single word of what I am saying.
If I didn`t drink, how would everyone know how much I love them at 2am?
Thank God I still have a few days left to achieve my goal of “going to the gym in 2014.”
Did you hear about the homeless guy that tried selling me meth?.... Yeah it was Bumcrack.