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Easy baked macaroni and cheese recipe: Boil macaroni in water.... follow the rest of the instructions on box. TADA!
Gas prices are a lot like girls: We just wish they would go down.
Money is the root of all evil. For more information, send $10 to me.
Collecting my thoughts… I almost have a whole set! ;)
When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.
I`ve single handedly defeated my erection.
The grass was greener on the other side, so we smoked it.
Not to brag, but I’m pretty good in bed. I don’t snore or steal covers, and I only pee if something startles me.
I`m gonna name my son Wussell so people think he has a speech impediment.
First comes love, then comes marriage. Then comes not making any decisions and feeling guilty about asking for blowjobs.
I don`t know why I even bother chewing corn.
There are two types of people in this world: those who know how to handle stress, and those who need bail money.
See, I would run, but it`s usually bodies of joggers that are found dead in the woods.
When your world is falling apart, when it seems like things can`t get any worse, please remember...I don`t give a s$it.
Of course it`s you....there`s no f*cking way it`s me...