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It`s called "Biscotti" because nobody would buy "chocolate covered croutons".
life is unfair theres 6 days between monday and sunday but only 1 between sunday and monday
Apparently Home Depot`s slogan of "You can do it; We can help" doesn`t apply to masturbation.
Just once would I like to see the "Phone a Friend" lifeline on Millionaire go straight to voicemail.
Today`s society is a good example of what happens when you let the clowns run the circus.
I hate when someone has a loud conversation on their cell phone and then gives me dirty looks for jotting down everything they say.
If you touch your phone in the right places, a pizza will arrive at your door.
I`ve just seen an advert in my local newspaper. ACCOUNTANT NEEDED! $35,000 - $40,000 So I called them up and said, "The answer is -$5,000."
Knock knock... whos there? Cows go... Cows go who, No, cows go moo
OMG, what a day I had. If Monday was a guy, I`d punch him in the throat!
Based on how I startle when toast pops up, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion.
I just want you to be happy. And naked.
Attention...my facebook page has been hacked. But everyone seems to like the new guy better, me too actually...so f**k it!
I smile because your my daughter. I laugh because there`s nothing you can do about it. ;)