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This is just a quick shout-out to bread bowls, waffle cones and other edible containers. You guys are doing a great job.
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God or man has rested.
Crap, summer is here and I`m nowhere near in drinking shape yet.
A birth control pill a day keeps the mini-van away.
To drink, or not to drink?...what a stupid question!
Never , under any circumstances , take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. O_o
Is "blowjob" one word or two words? God I hate writing thank you cards. -Bfanch
[boss calls me to office] We found a lot of disgusting porn on your computer. Thats a matter of opinion. Some may say it`s the right amount.
Why don`t strip clubs do Black Friday? It would be the one place I would camp out to go in.
I`m gonna name my son Wussell so people think he has a speech impediment.
I love finding money in my clothes. It’s like a gift to me ... from me.
TRUE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into a persons house and your wifi connects automatically.
I have decided to follow my dreams.....starting with that one where I am naked at work.
The only thing I have learned so far in this company meeting is that this room has 37 ceiling tiles and 24 fluorescent bulbs.
Friends who buy you food are friends for life.