Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Didn’t Selfie Sticks used to be called Friends?
I don`t always play candy crush. But when I do, I have tourettes like a motherf*cker.
"Love is all we need."-Said a wise man 40 years ago. He obviously has never had a computer
If it walks like a duck and it looks like a duck, the chances are she`s practising for her next selfie
Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It`s like Facebook in real life.
I`m getting all dressed up. Have a feeling I might be on COPS tonight.
"Probiotic" sounds a lot better than "bacteria infested"
I should start carrying a pool noodle in my car and randomly smack cars when stuck in traffic
My workout plan really only consists of me wandering around in parking lots because I forgot where I parked...
Learn cursive, they said. You`ll need it your whole life, they said.
A new study found that legalizing marijuana in Colorado has created more than 10,000 jobs...by keeping Taco Bell open 24 hours.
Sorry, when I said I have the stamina of an NBA player in bed I meant I take 10 timeouts in the final 2 minutes.
All you need is WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn`t move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn`t, use the tape.
I was just thinking…Then I thought “why?”... So there will be no more thinking today.
Sometimes in life you have to give the people around you a little push ... into traffic.