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Yes I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in.
From what I can gather, men hit their sexual peak around age 18. And women hit theirs as soon as the divorce is final.
I could be a morning person if morning happened after 11.
I should come with a warning label.
I keep having this dream that I`m being carried off by a giant squirrel. Does that make me nuts?
I`m the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body.
A guy knocked on my door asking for a small donation for the local pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
why were you in my dreams again? i`m starting to think you`re stalking me.
I wish Facebook wasn`t the only place I could block people from my life.
I would really like to help you move your furniture tomorrow, but Iām going to be too busy sitting on mine.
There are two rules to success in life - 1. Don`t tell people everything you know
Day Light savings this weekend is pissing me off, we will lose a hour we will never get back...........wait...thinkin`.....I guess we do....carry on...
You would think a popular place like the Krusty Krab would have more than two employees.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.