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I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
Why do guys go to bars to meet women? Go to Target. There`s like 10 women to each man and they`re already there looking for things they don`t need.
I love my six-pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.
thinks the voices in my head are out of beer.
Chili for breakfast. Cause I hate my Co-workers.
It’s not you. It’s me finally realizing that you’re terrible.
I`m an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.
If you’re a size 0 we shouldn’t be able to see you.
Only a fool trips on what`s behind him.
I watched my first porn movie today. I looked so much younger back then.
Pocketwatches were replaced by wristwatches, which became digitalwatches, which were replaced by mobile phones. Which we keep in our pockets
am feeling lazy......... jst like the guy who desighned the Japannese flag
Thanks, autocorrect. I`m sure she`s dying to know about my huge peninsula.
If my ceiling fan could hold my weight, I`d never be bored again.
The term "chubby chasers" is so inaccurate and misleading. Cause we don`t run.