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Just for kicks I posted "I won the LOTTERY" on Facebook. One girl liked it, then replied to the inbox message I sent her in 2010. *Blocked*
If you need to rush somewhere, carry a fire extinguisher. Nobody will stop a person running with a fire extinguisher.
Cashiers are always checking me out.
I`ve come to terms with the fact that I will never experience leftover pizza.
It`s funny to watch all these people Bumping Up their own posts.
There are over 10 different flavors of Ramen Noodles, yet they all taste like poverty and loneliness.
Always give 100% at work: 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday.
My friends were alway so nice. They were like "of course you`re not fat! Come on, grab two chairs and sit with us" :)
just read a list of "the 100 things to do before you die." Iยดm pretty surprised "yell for help" wasnยดt one of them.
Being able to eat while watching Hannibal makes you more of a psychopath than anyone on the show.
Every time I visit my parents, I send the kids in first so they can signal me if it`s an intervention.
What doesn`t kill you, will hopefully try again
I didn`t come here to make friends. I go to the cat shelter for that.
Dear life, When I asked if my day could get worse it was a rhetorical question not a challenge.