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My girlfriend and I have an open relationship and will continue to do so right up until she finds out.
Wanted: Someone to hand feed me Cheetos so my fingers don`t get orange..... P.S. No weirdos.
Do people smoke e-cigarettes after sexting?
As often as I lose lighters and sunglasses, it`s a good thing I never had kids. Or did I?
No one ever said life was easy, but several people did say that you were.
likes to end all my phone calls with "Ok, I`ll see you later on at the party!" and then quickly hang up. Let them figure it out.
I am not looking for a one night stand, 2 hours will be plenty enough.
Just hung a picture. I nailed it.
I’m glad we can’t smell each other through the internet.
Imagine taking your girlfriend to your friends house for the 1st time, and her phone automatically connects to his password protected wifi.
Paying a homeless man to pee on your ex`s windshield, is just about the most fun you can have with 5 bucks.
Relationships are like just-out-of-the-oven pizza. You know it`s going to burn you, but it looks so good and maybe this time it won`t?
Being stuck in the`` friend zone`` is like an employer refusing you for a job and calling you to complain about the person he hired.
Found out the difference between onions and men. I don`t cry when I`m chopping up men.
Kids maybe a gift..... But I like playing with the box it came in.