Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The best thing about telepathy is…I know, right?
Yes, bitches be trippin’ but maybe I pushed one.
I liked you until you started ignoring me and then I loved you. -Girls ---- Bfanch
Highschool Reunion? What for ? I`m on Facebook. I already know who got fat.
If you go shopping at Walmart and no one stares at you as you walk by, you`re one of them.
I wouldn`t be surprised if my kids think the phrase "goddamn douchebag" means someone who pulls out in front of your car without signaling.
Remember the good ole days when we had to get out of bed to use the Internet.
thinks we need to think like a first grade teacher and separate Romney and Gingrich next time they debate!
You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax and rich people can go to jail.
Sorry for nicking your car with my door, but you didn`t leave much room. It`s small, but I circled it with my key so you could find it.
Dear Car driving 40mph on the highway this morning. It`s only a 1/4“ of snow plus you have a "Jesus Fish" on your bumper. You`ll be just fine.
I`m out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?
roes are red violets are blue he`s for me not for you if for any chance you`ll take my place i`ll use my fist and smash your face
I was wondering why some couples don`t go to the gym together but I guess some relationships just don`t work out...
The only benefit of getting new clothes for Christmas is that I don`t have to do laundry for another week or two.