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My last post deserves WAY more likes than that....let`s go people....chop chop!
Is it safe to take off my Winter Solstice Glasses yet?
Weird how “news” and “fact checking” are treated like two separate concepts these days.
Speed bumps can turn into speed ramps depending on who`s car I`m borrowing.
I`m not saying you`re an idiot. I`m just saying that....Umm how do I word this?? I guess I am saying your`e an idiot.
The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.
The song "Take me out to the Ballgame" is sung almost exclusively by people who are already at a ballgame.
No one understands you better than some crazy weirdos on the internet.
I’m back on my feet again!! Wait, false alarm the remote is right here.
You don`t have to drink to have fun... Just have fun drinking!
A word to the wise ain`t necessary - it`s the stupid ones that need the advice.
Imagine coming home from a long vacation and finding your bathroom towels are wet from just being used. I can do that to your ex if you want.
Procrastination: when "make a bucket list" is on your bucket list.
Girls are supposed to dance. That`s why god gave them parts that jiggle.
I say No to drugs but they... won`t listen.