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I`ve actually have come to the conclusion that some of today`s youth may actually believe "laughing out loud" is actually spelled "lol"
You look over-medicated. What`s your doctor`s name?
Waiter: Would u like ur coffee black sir? Me: What other colors do u have?
I wish more people would give me the silent treatment.
You know what the cheapest meat is? Deer balls ... They`re under a buck
whoo hoo...I have new gutters. Please try and keep your mind out of them.
We look like we are being productive, but really, we are just talking sh!t about co-workers and how drunk we got last weekend.
If karma doesn`t hit you, I gladly will.
Juicing changed my life. I went from being overweight, to being overweight and owning a juicer.
To all those that now have a DUI, domestic violence charge or one less finger... Happy 5th of July
My phone tried to autocorrect "f*cking" to "f*ck king," and I was like hell yeah I am.
A lot of guys get married just because they`re hungry.
Mom in poetic mood ....Asked me to express emptiness .... I showed her my wallet ........ n m cheek still burns .... :-p :-p
Sometimes I get a little sad and feel like being alone. But then I talk to my dog about it and he reminds me I`m Awesome. Then WE DANCE.
What do horses eat? Hay. What do gay horses eat? Haaaayyyy!