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I hate when a couple argues in public but I missed the start and don`t know whose side I`m on.
I`m not shy. I`m just being quiet because I know that if I open my mouth to speak, a flow of never- ceasing, insulting comment directed at you will immediately spew from within me.
My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I`m camping, I won`t be covered.
I`m starting to think the Hangover Fairy and the Angel of Death are the same person.
Am I the only one who would like to see Punxsutawney Phil bite off the finger of the person that wakes him up every Groundhog Day.
You’d be more impressed with me if you never met anyone else.
Google must be a woman...it knows everything.
People who peel the entire banana before eating it must be the same ones who take off all their clothes to go to the bathroom.
Most of my colleagues and friends can`t spell colleagues or friends.
I dont think I could ever stab someone.. I barely can get the straw into a Capri Sun.
Redneck`s famous last words: "Is that enough duck tape?"
New documentary movie about white trash .... I only saw the trailer ....
It`s kind of creepy that you noticed me staring at you.
Chillin: the art of doing nothing without being bored.