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Teamwork is just another way of saying we will soon be sharing in the blame equally.
The meek shall inherit the earth. Probably because they`re the only ones who won`t complain about what we`ve done to it.
you know....I must be drop dead sexy because....cashiers are always checking me out….
Somedays I could do without the life lesson
My life has a great cast, but I can’t figure out the plot.
"I believe I can fry" - R Kelly filling out McDonald`s application
Having a bit of a lazy day, sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online ... My boss doesn`t look amused
I don’t always have a cool Facebook status, but when I do, an older relative ruins it with a lame comment.
I`m just gonna let my pillow decide my hairstyle for tomorrow.
Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
I have problems cleaning my house because I get distracted by all the fun things I find.
First thing I do when I realize I’m lost…turn the radio down.
Halloween is great because kids just show up at your door and hold out bags of candy for you to steal
Shoplifting may be wrong in a general sense, but what if, for example, I`m bored of paying for things