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Now there’s Adderall to perk up, Xanax to calm down, Prozac to feel normal. In my day we drank beer for all three.
I`m getting a mistletoe tramp stamp.
Designated drivers just drive me to drink.
Happy July 22nd! Today isn’t a holiday, but you’re alive and well, so why not celebrate?
Has anyone donated any money to ALS? All these ice bucket challenges I been seeing makes me think ... you all some cheap bastards
justin bieber
Look, all I`m saying is that the dinosaurs didn`t drink alcohol and look what happened to them.
Whoa. I just did something & almost forgot to document it on facebook. That was a close one.
I have tons of friends! Well i only have one... but she ways a ton!
I am going to open "The Karma Cafe" There will be no menus though. You will get what you deserve!
You know it was a good sh!t when you come back and your screensaver is on.
Isn`t it weird that a vacuum cleaner isn`t something that is used to clean vacuums?
I get butterflies in my stomach every time I eat butterflies.
Wouldn’t it be a smart idea? To make the sticky part on envelopes taste like chocolate?
When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it´s for them?