Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Apparently it was a bad idea to ask Siri, "What do women want?" She`s been talking for the last 2 days and doesn`t seem ready to shut up anytime soon.
Million Dollar Idea: Hire a bunch of people with OCD and start a cleaning company.
These techno songs last longer than my first marriage
Apparently you have to go to the gym more than once to get in shape, what the heck.
To those of you who received a book from me as a Christmas present: just to let you know that they are due back at the library tomorrow.
The first step is admitting you’re a problem.
and alcohol are now friends.
When someone says “You just made my day,” it makes my day.
I asked him about his weekend, but apparently what happens in vagueness, stays in vagueness.
I`ve decided!! I’m giving up my New Years resolutions for Lent.
People at airports must not workout much because they are all using these treadmills wrong...
Nobody looks back at their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep.
When your Dr. says "I`ll need to Google that"..... it`s time to change Doctors
It`s nice that my vacuum has a headlight just in case I want to clean in the dark or wake my dog up thinking he`s getting hit by a train.
The important thing to remember is that nobody asked you.