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Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance…the five stages of me hitting the snooze button in the morning
Happy new years, my friends. Thanks for supporting the site, Ralf.
Wow! it`s late.. I need to hit the sack........ Then go to bed.
I’m going to start telling girls that I’m available for a limited time only in hopes that their shopping instinct kicks in.
When a porn actress is rude at a restaurant, there`s really nothing the staff can put in her food for revenge.
Here`s a joke for all you mind readers...
Got this super hard game on my phone called Bank Of America. You only get a power up every 2 weeks? Need cheat codes
I`d have better people skills if I worked with better people.
if a guy tells you you`re ugly ; he wants you, if a girl tells you your ugly; she`s jealouse, if you a kid tells you your`re ugly..... you`re ugly.
I think you people lied to me...exactly how much of this hair of the dog do I have to eat before this hangover goes away?
Telling me to calm down is the easiest way to get me to tell you to go f*ck yourself.
12 year olds having sex ? Im sorry when i was 12 i was to afraid to pull my foreskin back incase my d*ck fell out.
Most people are lucky they can’t hear what I’m thinking.
Karma may "work" but I think that bitch takes a lot of days off
Buying your wife a gun is like saying. "You know, I kinda want to kill myself, but I want it to be a surprise."