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word of the day: nincomtard
Life is better when you can share it with a friend that has the same sick, twisted personality as yourself.
You don`t have to like me, I`m not a Facebook status.
Yes, milk from cows tastes nice. But to the person that first found that out...you have issues bro
The only time my wife will ever scream "DEEPER, DEEPER" is when they are lowering my casket into the ground
She was rare, like an onion ring in french fries
Drinking coffee is a fun way to become dependent on paying money to wake up.
You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch
is a reasonably intelligent person who does moderately stupid things on a semi-regular basis.
It won`t be the alcohol or cigarettes that kill me. It will be my inability to know when I should or shouldn`t laugh at something.
I got in touch with my inner child and the little sh!t hung up on me.
You know you had an interesting day when your Google search history includes "rubber panda".
If I could have sex with anyone, living or dead, I would for sure pick living.
I`ve got a lot to unlearn.
I heard recently on the radio that, "If a man looks at womens breasts for 10 mins a day he will add 5 years to his life".. Can anyone confirm this?!! If so what are we waiting for?