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Halloween Drinking Game: Drink every-time an Elsa (from Frozen) visits your house.
I propose we change the names of the upper case P and lower case p to "P standing up" and "p sitting down."
Roses are red vilouts are blue your moms beautiful what happened to you!
Days are short in December but spending them with family really stretches them out.
Anyone else ever thought about farting into one of those plastic cylinders at the bank drive-thru?
Keep calm and pretend today isn’t Monday.
As i walk thru the valley of the shadow of death i was like what da f**k am i doin here
You can dress for success or undress for it. It depends on what type of work you want.
Love is... saving money to buy her shoes!
How can I learn to be more patient? (I`m only interested in quick-fix solutions with immediate results please)
The fact that I start clapping every time someone says "Please give me a hand" is only like the number 6 reason I dont have friends.
Your girlfriend is rated E... For Everyone
I`m posing nude for an art class. No one asked me to. I think they`re making ceramic bowls.
The person next to me just farted.. Does this mean my lungs are full of his poo particles -.-
The awkward moment when someone say "I gotta use the restroom.... Never mind."