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Wrapping these baby carrots in Tootsie Roll wrappers is exhausting but the payoff will be worth it come Halloween.
Hell hath no fury like me when Iām slightly inconvenienced and hungry.
Do bees even have knees?
In a thousand years, archeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment.
Tonight`s good mood is sponsored by ... Beer!!
I don`t like making plans for the day, because then the pesky word "premeditated " gets thrown around in court.
Always be yourself, unless you can be Batman, always be Batman.
Those who stir the sh!t pot should have to lick the spoon.
When you think about it, the little old man behind the curtain in Oz was the original catfish.
Shout out to sidewalks. Thanks for keeping me off the streets.
If history repeats itself then I am SO getting a dinosaur.
Want to watch a nerd have a melt down? Tell him that you just bought an Android Ipad.
Your so old, you knew Burger King when he was a prince.
Who wants to go Smart Car Tipping?
Forget Klondike, you should see what I`d do for an open bar.