Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
A fun way to get exercise is grab a chainsaw and chase a hiker.
My favorite Facebook photo of your baby is easily #28,614
Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
Sometimes when someone appears to be hailing a cab, I go up and high five their hand because you can never be too sure.
If you don’t cuss when you drive you aren’t paying enough attention to the road.
I`ll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones
I once bought shoes in China that said "made around the corner"
Where have you been all my life? Can you go back there?
Cop cars should play the jaws theme song
Don`t you just love it when you see someone who is photogenic, looks perfect in every picture but then when you see them in person you`re like EURGH God Damn! What happened to you in the last 24h!
I only use the outdoors to get to another indoors.
I prefer to think outside the box because things can get very dark inside it.
Tonight I`m playing hard to get off the sofa.
I hate when I`m about to hug someone really sexy, and my face hits the mirror.
People who really love their jobs are annoying. Keep that sh!t to yourself.