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This status was brought to you by me being bored on the toilet.
I can´t wait until Weight Watchers comes out with a beer.
I am a very tolerant person until you think differently than me. Then I act like a spoiled little brat.
I can`t face my checkbook so I check my Facebook.
When I become famous I`m not going to tell anyone.
I know I should lift weights, but those things are heavy!!
National no bra day wasn`t as successful as the creators had hoped. due to sagging attendants and lack of support.
It`s frustrating to know, I`ll never experience the exhilaration of getting to meet me.
Boobs are like the Sun. You can stare at them directly just for a few seconds, but if you put on sunglasses, you can stare as much as you want!
Watch out! It’s quite possible some of my best mistakes haven’t been made yet.
Sometimes after many years of marriage, you just look at your wife and wonder how she stayed with you this long without you killing her.
Sorry I made fun of your erectile dysfunction, I hope there’s no hard feelings.
You can always tell a lot about a woman the way she pours gasoline around your car.
Turns out a At Home DNA Test is not a good baby shower gift.
I`m not naughty ... I`m mischievously creative