Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
So, when is this Old Enough To Know Better thing supposed to kick in?
I don`t necessarily enjoy being the bad influence...but hey, somebody has to do it!
This pizza looks like a pie chart of 100% good news.
Today is Valentine’s Day or as I call it… Tuesday.
I don`t know if I`ve got some free time, or if I just forgot what the hell I`m supposed to be doing...
I’m “had to actually call a girl on the home phone to ask her out while hoping my mom didn’t pick up and start dialing” years old.
Do you know what’d look good on you? Me
I keep graphic, full frontal nude pictures of myself on my cell phone in case anyone ever hacks it. That`ll teach `em.
This Halloween, the only Candy I`m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues
Smile, it´s the second best thing you can do with your lips.
In Starbucks a customer went sh*t house rat crazy when they got a double shot of espresso instead of the triple shot they ordered ... I`m fine now.
We all make mistakes .... I just do it better than everyone else.
2013 is the first year since 1987 to have 4 different numbers… carry on.
I wake up everyday planning to be productive and then a voice in my head says “haha good one” and we laugh and laugh and take a nap.
When people see ghosts, why aren`t they naked? Do clothes die and become ghosts too?