Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Make somebody happy today... mind your own business!!!
If you own a podium and put up a sign that says "valet" on it, can you just steal cars?
Picking and choosing who to say happy birthday to since 2006, thanks Facebook!
If they have an Ice Cream Truck for kids why don’t that have a Beer Truck for adults?
Somedays I feel like running away. Then I remember how much I hate running.
500 + friends... and not one of you saw where I put the remote?
The path to inner peace begins with 3 simple words....Not my problem.
I once overdosed on Viagra. My wife took it really hard.
Sarcasm is funnier when used on people who don`t understand it.
Everyone`s self worth should only be measured by how useful they would be in the zombie apocalypse.
Don’t bother looking up “impose.” It’s next to impossible.
They say dolphins are the second smartest animal after humans, but I`ve never seen a dolphin with a face tattoo.
I wish there was a reality show where people learned grammar.
The Family Reunion went pretty good until they all figured out that I wasn`t related to any of them
Don`t sweat the petty things and don`t pet the sweaty things.