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How do I tell my boss I don`t want to do work anymore but still want money.
I make way more decisions than I should based on the battery life of my phone.
If I truly posted what was on my mind ... I´d most likely be in a psychiatric hospital right now.
I was sad, because I had no shoes. Until I met a man that had no feet. So, I took his shoes, cuz hey, he wan`t using them anyway!
Work like you don`t have proof of citizenship, Love like you were on a reality TV show, and dance like you were being thrown 100 dollar bills at
Please: No,No.No-More about how you think relationships should be: we`ve got it , Your Single,,- get off facebook and go take your own expert advise...
I hate it when I write a sarcastic Facebook status and someone who doesn’t speak sarcasm has to comment and ruin it.
With all the potato chip flavors available now, I see no point in buying actual food...
Ladies, if you want men to look at your face and not your chest, eat a banana.
Hey whiny kids with iPhones: when I was your age, I played with a stick.
Had another daydream where I`m doing the mexican hat dance and CIA guys watching me from satellites are dancing along in their control room
According to this BMI chart ... I am to short.
How come people who think they know everything never seem to know when to shut up?
Saying "cool" also means, I don`t give a sh!t.
I`m the type of person who will throw away the manual and ponder for 3 hours "where the hell do I start"