Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Man, this Trojan gum I bought tastes terrible ... Blows amazing bubbles though
I called one of those numbers in the bathroom stall and my wife answered. Very funny guys.
Sometimes I get road rage standing in lines.
People always get so excited about the next generation iPhone but no one has caught up with the awesome technology that`s called a Turn Signal.
Someone told me that I seemed a little more classy than usual. The only thing I can think of is they somehow found out I used a Target bag instead of one from Wal Mart to line my bathroom`s wastepaper basket.
If you’re not fully satisfied with your life, do something about it. Or complain about it on the internet. Whatever you prefer.
Apparently a good way to get asked to leave the gym is to move a treadmill behind a guy on a stationary bike and pretend you`re angrily chasing him.
No pornhub I do not want to share this video with my friends & family on Facebook
Don´t believe all the rumours you hear about me, the truth is much worse.
With great power comes great electricity bill.
Tattoos are an expensive and painful way to guarantee that the police can make a positive identification.
Jokes on you hot chick at the bar who gave me a radio station`s phone number I just won Harlem Globetrotter tickets and a Bud Light poncho.
A blind man walks into a bar....and a stool....and a table....
I worry about people who write "taken" in their bios. Where did they go? Who took them and why aren`t we helping to find them?
My car broke down outside Pizza Hut last night. So I ordered a pizza to be delivered to my house and got a lift from the driver.