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I love the way everyone who uses hand sanitizer looks like they`re hatching some kind of evil plan.
Surly not EVERYBODY was Kung-Foo fighting?
I see you`re busy. I`ll come back later and ruin your free time.
Actually I don`t think it would be all that hard to get out of a pickle.
It’s strange to think that the sound of nature is the sound of millions of animals desperately trying to get laid.
I’m amazing in bed. I have the ability to stay there all day.
How can Wal-mart have a bazillion carts and everyone with at least one wobbly wheel?
The Internet: 1% information 1% jokes 98% outrage over information and jokes
I was called a village idiot today which really upset me ... I live in a city.
"I`m glad the weekends over" -Nobody ever
I`m so great, I`m jealous of myself.
He who laughs first, must be connected to wi-fi.
Why do we even ask rhetorical questions?
I don´t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
Yes, I used to "dance like no one is watching"; at least until Google Earth sent me a certificate for ten free lessons.