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Do you really know me or am I just an idea that you`ve built in your head?
How do you know you`re old? ... Check your glove box for paper maps ...
It`s been few days since I heard from the voices in my head, I think it`s the calm before the storm. Some big sh!t is gonna go down!!
According to the law it`s not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership.
Damn…I’m having an out of money experience.
McDonald`s sponsoring the Olympics is like Jack Daniels sponsoring the prom.
If I could have dinner with anyone alive or dead I would just have two dinners.
OMG, you`re huge! There`s no way you`ll fit inside me.- My clothes probably.
I`m thinking about starting a vegetarian dance club... I`m going to call it "lettuce turnip the beets". What do you think?
I`ve decided to take some time off Facebook so I can focus on work and, ok, I`m back
I hate when its dark and your brain is all "you know what we haven`t thought about in a while ... demons."
Single Awareness Day ..... it`s a S.A.D. day
What did I get for Christmas? Fat...
I dont run from my problems, I chase them ... with alcohol
the only way I know something is bad for me is if I like it