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Saying an actors performance was unbelievable is actually an insult.
For all those girls that say `all guys are the same` ... Who told you to try them all? Hoe.
Do you ever get that feeling that you are being watched? Because if it is bothering you, I can stop.
I hate it when I put on my apple bottom jeans and cannot find my boots with da fur!!
There’s always that one person that catches you doing something weird.
When someone says I love you over the phone and you don`t feel the same, just say `I love youtube` but say it really fast!
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
My hair looks amazing today. I hope I see everybody I hate.
Multitasking? I’m not even good at unitasking.
Three words to ruin a woman`s ego. "I can`t tell."
I go from "Hard to get" to "Hard to get rid of" in 6 beers flat.
Have you tried complaining about it for hours?
Porn teaches kids an unhealthy and unrealistic idea of how quickly a plumber will come to your house.
There`s nothing a floored gas pedal and cranked music can`t cure.
When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?