Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you are being attacked by a bunch of clowns the first thing to do is go for the juggler.
The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider doing it.
Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
If I were the guy who made the Where’s Waldo books I would have totally made a page where Waldo wasn’t there.
I`m not crazy I`m just special! No wait maybe I am crazy.. One second, I have to talk to myself about this hold on...
I just broke my record for most days lived.
I don`t know who you are, but if you don`t stop sending me phone books, I will find you.....and I will smack you with it
Daylight Savings makes us lose an hour... It’s kind of like Facebook.
Even if you don`t pay, they`ll usually let you go through a car wash at least once a day without a car.
I`ve just finished doing my hair, want to come over and mess it all up?
You know when dogs sticks their heads out of a moving car window, bite at the air and it looks like fun? I tried it. It is.
Politeness has become so rare, that some people mistake it for flirting.
I went frisbee golfing today. I didn`t get an ace, but I did hit a guy and that was just as satisfying.
If you want to talk to me on the phone, I need at least three days notice.
i dont have drain bramage.