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I just passed the local college and saw 3 very fit young ladies with very tight yoga pants walking to class...I have never been so motivated to return to college.
Half the journey is knowing where you’re parked.
If I agree with you, we would both be wrong.
Let`s fix the obesity problem AND improve eye-hand coordination by replacing vending machines with claw machines, make people earn snacks.
I wish I was as fat as the first time I thought I was fat.
Think of a number between 0 and 20. Add 40 to it. Multiply by 2. Subtract 3. Now close your eyes.... It`s dark isn`t it.
I love when bill collectors ask if you can borrow the money...uh I did that before and I think we both know how that turned out.
The trouble with bucket seats is that, not everybody has the same size bucket.
Hangman was my favorite childhood learning game that promoted hanging someone for a wrong answer.
I have said it before. I will at it again. If anyone is into wife swapping. I will take a dirtbike or a puppy. Hit me up.
I just kicked a can in my driveway and somehow ended up with a goal against Brazil.
When Miley is naked & licks a hammer it’s “art” & “music” ... but when I do it, I`m “wasted” & “have to leave Home Depot"
Most of life is waiting for whatever you`re at to be over.
Going to the toilet without your phone is like going to war without a gun
You find it offensive?... I find it funny.... That`s why I`m happier than you