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Today`s big idea - Coffee eye drops
The only "B" word you should call a woman is "beautiful"... B!tches love being called beautiful.
Men, if a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is. If she starts to growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate at her.
In terms of procrastination, I had a very productive day.
The only dates I get are updates.
Everyday I’m shoveling. – Winter 2014
If I lived in England I would approach my boss on payday and say "pound me."
Life is not fair. But life is not fair for everyone, which actually makes it fair.
Just ate a whole bag of chips, but it was “reduced fat” so basically it was like going to the gym.
there`s only 2 things in life you have control in changing that is your attitude and a kids diaper.. which at times both can be the equivalent of the other..
I need medical attention, but I will settle for just regular attention.
When a man says he`ll do anything for a woman, he means slaying dragons, killing zombies and rescuing her from castle towers. IT DOES NOT MEAN cleaning garage, fixing roof and cleaning out the basement!
You`re the reason I wake up everyday. Just kidding I have a job.
I don`t mean to brag, but my posts are enjoyed by well over 20 people worldwide...
Soon ovens will come with webcams and wireless connections so that posting photos of your dinner will be even easier.