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Before the internet I used to like people.
Everything you paid $50,000 to learn in college is now on the Internet for free.
I bet Jellyfish are sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish.
What if the lightbulb had never been invented? How would we know when someone has a really good idea?
Bored? Find group photo of 4 women. Comment "You 3 look incredible!!"
I think salads help you lose weight because they`re gross and you end up not eating them
loves driving down the road and just waving at random people like you know them!:D
I only eat the entire pint of ice cream in one sitting so that I won`t be tempted to eat it later.
When people ask how my childhood was, I say "Pretty good, so far."
Even though I`m a guy I still get nervous when I pee on a pregnancy test.
Hooters does have hot girls, but the Subway girls are the real wife material.
Share this if you know someone who is alive today simply because you don`t want to go to prison.
Men also have feelings. For example, we can feel hungry
Just when I think I`m over my insomnia the car behind me honks.
Reincarnation is my only hope.