Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If I don`t `like` your post it`s because I don`t care...
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God or man has rested.
Why do we call it toilet paper? Does anyone wipe their toilet with it?
Yes, I know how to shut up. I just don´t know when.
Group Therapy: listening to ALL your voices.
I exercised once, but found I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous.
Making fun of someone you`re angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car, instead
Here`s hoping the wind at your back doesn`t come from the corned beef and cabbage you had for lunch. Happy St. Patrick`s Day!
Sometimes you`ve got to ask yourself: "Why am I talking to myself?"
I just sent out my daily text to a random number saying "I hit Zack with my truck. I`m going to need to use your hacksaw to cut him up.
The first 5 days after the weekend are always the hardest....
If you can`t handle me at my worst, then that sucks because that`s all there is to me.
all joking aside, think how many babies might be created tonight on valentines day
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
I read that India launched a rocket to Mars the other day. That seems like a strange place to put a call center?