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Taco Bell is donating burritos to feed firefighters in Colorado. Talk about putting gas on the fire,
Look, all I`m saying is, you never see Nikki Manaj and E.T. in the same place at the same time.
is on a Mission. The magic leprechaun told me to follow the pink racehorse to the rainbow where the orange elephant is holding my skittles hostage
Your lights are on but I see someone’s been playing with your dimmer switch.
Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.
Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop and where to spend it
Not every flower can say love...but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst...but a cactus did. Not every idiot can read, but look at you go!!!! lol
I like superheroes but I`d rather hang out with the villains.
I plan my entire day around the possibility of a nap.
I think there should be a mandatory test at 16 that you have to pass and if not, you get neutered or spayed.
is not rude...I just wasn`t taught to politely pretend to be nice to people I can`t stand.
If I had spoken to my parents the way some children do now, I would not be here to share this status.
If Santa’s helper takes a picture in the mirror, is that an elfie?
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted.
Research is what I`m doing when I don`t know what I`m doing.