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When someone is in a bad mood, I like to help matters by pointing out several times that they seem to be in a bad mood.
life is like a bed of roses just got to whatch out for the pricks
The key to any successful marriage is separate TVs.
Pool party at my house, bring ur own pool..
Thou shall not promote Christmas until after Thanksgiving.
Somehow, going into The Dollar Store and asking for a price check just never gets old.
The best part about living by myself is not having to explain a lot of things......a LOT of things.
I just wanted to say thank you to all the people that have given me a reason to drink this Friday night.
Pregreening - creeping forward while waiting for a red light to change.
Still have my French Maid costume in case any of you have a dirty house. I`ll be happy to sit there and look sexy while your wife cleans....
If money grew on trees, Congress would actually care about the environment.
Sometimes I laugh so hard the tears run down my leg ;)
Designated Driver is just a nicer way of saying, you can come with us, but nobody wants to deal with your drunk a$$.
Being all talk and no action sounds relaxing.
Wondering if my heart is healthy enough for sex ... volunteers needed.