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I believe in karma that means I can do bad things to people I don’t like and assume they deserved it.
Ever notice how the automatic flush sensors in public restrooms kinda look like hidden cameras?
Same sex marriage? Heck, I know couples who would be happy with a SOME sex marriage
Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.
I’ve never pretended to be anything I’m not…except for sober. I’ve pretended to be sober a few times.
You might be a REDNECK if you think S.T.O.P. means spin tires on pavement!! :)) lol
You can make up any word you want in conversation and if you use it in a dilsationary way, people rarely question the meaning.
Trust me, when they make a pill that REALLY makes your d!ck grow, that commercial will be on during the Super Bowl, not 3am!
I`m a crabby a$$ bitch before my coffee ... and after
If you can read this, you`re not having sex either.
Let’s just call a vacation what it is: the opportunity to live like an alcoholic for a little while.
When I said I like it rough I was talking about the sex, not the whole entire relationship...
Some people pass through our lives just to teach us not to be like them.
Sometimes I send status updates from my phone so it looks like I left the house.
I imagine some people are like...: `should I take the shower?...no...I`m taking the train today...`