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Chicken salad with egg in it is my fave way to eat two generations.
I enjoy being the black sheep of the family ... Black sheep are the prettiest & don`t show as much dirt as the white ones.
I have no interest in skydiving. I get enough of an adrenaline rush hoping my credit card goes through
Not sure what to do with all the daylight we are saving.
If I am home alone, there`s a 99% chance I`m naked.
I love you more each day as my other options diminish.
I’ve been that, done that, had that, lost that, needed that and felt that. Just a few of the many reasons why I always drink to “that”.
I wonder if dogs ever wake up in the morning and think "dear god please don`t take me jogging with you today"?
Just saw Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter... So that`s how it happened! I knew what I learned in history class was a bunch of crap!
My New Years Resolution is to be more positive and less sarcastic...I wonder how long this bull$hit fantasy will last.
Imagine if someone`s name was Gurt. You`d be all "yo gurt!" .. funny? no? Ok (._.)
Now reached the age where getting lucky is what happens when I can remember where I set my glasses down at
Everyday I fall in love with you more and more. Except yesturday, yesturday you were pretty f*cking annoying.
It`s amazing the things I can remember when I don`t need to remember anything.
LOSE WEIGHT FAST! Mix equal parts warm water, apple cider vinegar, & lemon juice toss that disgusting sh!t into a sink & get on a treadmill.