Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Much to my daughters horror, I just sang along to Ace of Base`s “The Sign” at full volume in a van full of her friends. Being a dad is fun!
If you allow your pets to roam free in our neighborhood, I`m gonna put party hats on em. This is non-negotiable.
"They Dared Me To" should be a legitimate excuse in a Court of Law.
there are so many scams on the internet now...... Send me $19.95 an I`ll tell you how you can avoid them
In the United States a man gets kicked in the groin every 6.2 seconds. I would hate to be that man.
I think I have a serious problem---Today I was reading the newspaper and found myself looking for the "Like" button.
Dear autocorrect, at no point in time have I meant to say "I`m affordable" instead of "I`m adorable".
This is the third time someone in Liam Neeson`s family has been abducted, they really need to stop leaving the house.
I`m working out my budget and, provided I don`t live past Tuesday, I can retire relatively comfortably!!!
Remember, condoms prevent minivans.
Imagine if someone`s name was Gurt. You`d be all "yo gurt!" .. funny? no? Ok (._.)
Actually told a girl who`s moving to France soon that "there`s lots of French people over there". It`s a wonder how I can even bathe myself.
I think I may be getting harder to love.
My friend David had his ID stolen yesterday. We just call him Dav now
:): The Bipolar smiley face