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Monica & Chandler’s twins would be 9 this year, Pheobe’s triplets 14, Ben 18, and Emma 11. Let’s just take a moment to let that sink in.
People say "Happy Thanksgiving" which is nice, but then they ruin it by saying "Don`t eat too much". Do they want me to have a Happy Thanksgiving or not?
I wish I could use Shazam to identify people when I cant remember their name.
If you are stalking me, please keep up, I have a lot of errands today.
Don`t get me started Bitches, I don`t come with brakes.
No pants are the best pants.
My friends were alway so nice. They were like "of course you`re not fat! Come on, grab two chairs and sit with us" :)
Any woman can make you a Millionaire.. You only have to be a Billionaire first.
What`s cardio, and can I eat it?
I feel bad for the photons that travel 93 million miles from the sun and then have to bounce off your stupid face.
Men who claim women belong in the kitchen definitely do not know what to do with them in the bedroom!
I don`t have a drinking problem. If anything, I`m TOO good at it.
Wonders why we can`t just all get a Long....Island Iced Tea?!?
Apparently I`d rather debate in my mind whether or not to get up and pee than sleep.
It`s not a real hangover until you bring a pillow into the bathroom.